Credit: Andreas Constantinou
Having a client really is like dating. You both enter into a relationship with all kinds of baggage. You both have histories. You both have expectations based on past experiencse, and sometimes you even have trust issues.
Sometimes, one of you has really high expectations because of past relationships, and when that happens, it helps to stop and ask yourself: if something was so great back then, why didn’t it work out?
And just like a romantic relationship, when something goes terribly wrong, often both sides share blame (maybe one a little more than the other), because it takes two to tango. Take apologies, for example: it takes a big person to admit that they’re wrong, but it takes a bigger person to accept that apology, forgive them, and move on with no hard feelings.
You see, even when it’s someone else’s f**ks up, it’s still your problem, and when something is your problem, it becomes your responsibility. And if you don’t accept that responsibility, then you’re just as much to blame as the next guy.
This is the difference between fault, responsibility, and blame. Someone else’s fault is often still your problem and your responsibility, and you’re just as much blame if you don’t live up to that responsibility.
In fact, this is a recurring theme that we see in religion all the time. A perfect being made an imperfect man, but we’re still expected to struggle with those imperfections, partly by improving on those we can, and partly by accepting the limitations of our imperfections — whether they’re our own, or those of others.
And what’s religion for other than giving us an example of how to live our lives better? So maybe it’ll help next time someone falls short of our expectations to take the shortcoming for what it is, accept responsibility for what we got ourselves into with them, and choose to react in a way that reflects and lives up to that responsibility.
{ 3 comments… read them below or add one }
CT- Like any relationship, I think the client relationship comes down to managing expectations and perception. Good communications and positive experiences should yield a mutually beneficial relationship that can lead to happily ever after.
I agree with Michael above – particularly as we have seen client relationships and referrals bring over half our business over the last year – word of mouth is still underrated in the internet world.
I don’t quite agree with the maxim the “customer is always right”, but it’s certainly true that you should always try and help your clients out with any problems, even if they are self created. At the end of the day – if you do a good job, word will be spread; likewise with a bad or simply lazy job.
I never really thought of it that way but you are right. It is like entering into a relationship with ups and downs and communication problems. Great article!